Being Human

There's an insurance agency in town that has been trying to get my business for four years. Four years ago, I met with the owner of the agency and he gave me a quote on our car insurance, but I ended up not giving him my business at that time. Since that meeting, the agency has called every six months, about a month in advance of our policy renewal date, offering to give me another competitive quote.

Finally, a couple of weeks ago, I gave in. I agreed to meet with them again. I took copies of my auto and home insurance policies and arrived at the appointed time. I walked in the door, ready to be schmoozed. The woman behind the desk continued working on her computer for a moment or two, then looked at me distractedly and pronounced, "You must be, uh, Marston." Not a friendly and familiar "Ralph", not a respectful "Mr. Marston", simply an object, a name on a file folder, "Marston."

"Yes," I replied. "I'm Ralph Marston. I have an appointment with Linda."

"I'm Nicole," she replied. "Have a seat and I'll be right with you." Then she disappeared into the back room and came back after a few moments. No explanation of what happened to Linda, who was so nice and charming on the phone.

We proceeded with the insurance review. She took my policies, keyed the numbers into her computer, printed out quotes for both my auto and homeowners coverage, and explained all the details. Not once did she ever attempt to connect with me in a personal way. She was very competent, she had helpful answers to all my questions, but she simply failed to establish any kind of rapport with me.

During the meeting, the owner of the agency came out and greeted me as if our meeting four years ago had just been the other day. He told me that business was so good he was moving the agency to a larger space. Then he retreated back into his office, never to be seen again.

I told Nicole that the quoted prices looked very good. Though the premium on the auto insurance was about the same as what I was already paying, the premium on the homeowners was about 35% lower -- a significant difference. This is a major, well-respected insurer whose name most of you would recognize instantly. I told her I would take the information home and "think about it" for a few days. It was Thursday. She replied that she would call me on Monday. Fine, I said, and left.

As soon as I walked out of the office, I knew I didn't want to do business with them. They were very professional, they had a very good price, and they offered service that was probably a little better than what I'm now getting. But I just didn't feel right about them. Being addressed as "Marston" certainly didn't help. It reminded me of a junior high P.E. coach. "Hey, Marston, gimme 10 laps."

I considered telling them this on Monday when they called, saying that their prices looked very good but that I just didn't feel comfortable with them. How could they counter that objection? Then, I thought, why even bother -- I'll just tell them I'm not interested and offer no explanation.

Then something very surprising and unexpected happened. After four years of phone calls every six months, phone calls that were timed to the exact week, after numerous offers to review my policies, after regular flyers in the mail, no one called on Monday. Or Tuesday, or Wednesday. It has now been more that a week since my meeting, and I've not received a follow-up call, a call which was specifically promised on a particular day. I still can't believe it.

On Tuesday I did receive a letter in the mail from the agency owner, thanking me for the opportunity to review my insurance. The letter was filled with phrases such as "We realize", "we see ourselves", "we offer" "we are". A lot of we's. Not many you's.

For me, this whole experience has driven home a very important point. You hear phrases all the time like "People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care." They sound good, and most of us agree that they have a ring of truth. You accept something like that on an intellectual level. It takes an experience like the one I described to make it real.

I consider myself to be an extremely objective, logical person. I don't like to think that I am influenced by my irrational, subjective emotions. I like to think that I make decisions based on facts, not on "gut feelings."

However, as I grow more experienced, I have learned that those silly old illogical, emotional, gut feelings have a basis in reality. There is a whole other level of truth, beyond the intellect, that those gut feelings can convey. I'm not trying to get too mystical or spiritual here, but this does approach that realm. There is something about being human that transcends logic and reason as we think we know it.

There was a time when you could compete and prosper on logic and reason alone. Get an engineering degree, build a bridge, manufacture products, write computer programs, master the intricacies of the legal system. Now, we are becoming so interconnected that that strategy is no longer a guarantee of success. Intellectual knowledge and know-how is becoming so widely accessible, and is changing so fast, that it no longer offers the competitive advantage it once did. It is certainly necessary to have and to get more of, but no one has a monopoly on it anymore.

In his newly published "Being Digital", Nicholas Negroponte writes, "Computing is not about computing anymore. It is about living."

Our machines are freeing us from the drudgery of life at a pace that is growing exponentially, while at the same time enabling us to produce creations of all kinds with little or no hindrance. And we are very quickly approaching the point where it is our creativity that is the key.

Discipline is of critical importance. Focus is vital. We have grown up, however, being taught to value a set of disciplines that, while they have served us well indeed, are fast losing their importance. Disciplines such as showing up for work on time, being able to remember all the rules of accounting, legible handwriting. Metaphorically, we have memorized all the arcane keyboard commands of the old Wordstar program, and now Microsoft Word for Windows version 6 has come along and made all that knowledge completely unnecessary. So now what is our strategy?

In the world that's emerging, the disciplines that matter are the human disciplines. It no longer matters that you have the lowest price. It no longer matters that you can print out a crisp, attractive, easy-to-read quotation. It no longer matters that you can call up your customer's records at the touch of a button. Those things are necessary, but they no longer convey any competitive advantage, because everybody offers them.

What matters is the ability to connect with people. "People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care." That has always been a prescription for success. Now it is a requirement.

You can offer all sorts of state-of-the-art products, fast paying compensation plans, sparkling sales aids, energetic meetings and the like. In the end, though, it comes down to connecting with people. Network marketing has a clear advantage in this arena -- that's where the industry comes from, and that's what gives network marketing its power. The power of people to people connections. Developing rapport. Fully tapping into what it means to be human. Learning how to show how much you care.

The day will soon come when we'll forget that anything else ever mattered.